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Forsaken by De'Neene Bryan

I am standing at the gates of heaven asking, “Is it too late?”

Forsaken—the world beneath rejected is who I am.

I began to tell my story to heaven’s ears.

Forsaken—I was tricked into turning tricks.

I was out for a dime—glitters, glimmer and all that shit.

Killed before I had begun to live.

Putting myself at risk, for my mind was set to be blind.

I thought my Lord was so unkind.

Forsaken me?

The man up on the cross that died.

You saved the whole world.

But you forgot about me my Lord.

I lied.
I cried.
Onto my next trick, to afford my next fix—the mix that was too rich.

I got lost in a deep, darken ditch that was cold and lonely.

I felt my body reach its last twitch of life.

Out of space and out of time of course out of my mind.

I was wronged by life’s perceptions.

I was twisted about reality unknowns.

Nowhere was I missed.

Suddenly, I switch my mind unblind.

I see the light that was bright and for once right.

Am I too late?

“For thou shall not kill,” said you, my Lord.

My Lord you hate a liar, a thief, and a murderer.

I lied to get here.

I stole.

I took the very life that you gave to me freely.

“Ask and you shall be forgiven,” said you, my Lord.

I am asking and I am dead.

Was it I?

Me who forsaken me instead of you, my Lord?

Have I cheated myself out of entering your heavenly doors?

I Am by De'Neene Bryan

I am De' Neene

I am nothing that this world thought I would ever be but everything it has thrown at me.

I am very happy but sadden with the anger that has chained me to my past.

I am strong yet weakened in my thoughts by the hurt that has left me emotionally scarred by its memories of yesterday’s dreams.

I am proud of what I have become through desperate hard work I put into myself but shamed with all of the blessed opportunities I just simply gave away.

I am all that my parents envisioned that I would be when they would one day have a daughter short of what was really given to me as a girl when that time came to them.

I am every honorable title a female carries through life if she is blessed to take center stage but stamped with every mistake that leaves me wondering if I am good enough for that next step.

I am here to win with more chances of failing.

I am a princess turned queen trapped in a witches’ body that can change without notice.

I am smart with a hanging image of dumbness staring at me in a world of mirrors that says you are less than because you are greater than it's expectations of you. 

But nevertheless of what is put before, behind or beneath me I am and I will always be more than an after thought. I am the beginning of what was never said. I am the last impressed thought of what could have been told. I am the middle sound that has always been heard.

I am not lost but I am found.